Why do people hate France so much
Typically French - prejudice and truth about France
"I still decide what is typically French!" (Unknown)
But before I reveal the truth to you - incidentally in a perfect French disorder - let me tell you that I myself lived in France for seven years. So my scientific authority is at least as great as that of Uli Wickert.
Oh là là, the French!
First things first: beautiful women are typically French. Brigitte Bardot is the incarnation of the beautiful French woman, back when she was young. Every second French woman looks like Brigitte Bardot back then, only with black hair. The others, aesthetically, commute between Heidi Klum and Claudia Schiffer. There are ugly French people; Ugly French women only exist in the dirty imagination of Dante's Divine Comedy, if at all.
Monsieur le Flirtheld
Slim, brilliantly flirting men are typically French - albeit with restrictions. Because half of the French are known to consist of cozy, pot-bellied men with red noses, wine glasses and baguettes in hand. And the French are a brilliant flirt only in comparison to the German - in other words, relative. Scientific studies show that German women must fatefully succumb to the seduction skills of French men. It is not your fault.
Haute couture and the death penalty
France is the heartland of haute couture and sophisticated perfumes. It is typically French to pay attention to one's appearance in a pleasant way. This is where the French differ from the Teutonic species of Homo sapiens berlinensis, which graces the public space with its oldest gray baggy training pants. In France, such offenses are punishable by the death penalty.
Work, strike and vacation
When the French are not flirting, smelling themselves or sorting their clothes, they go on strike or prepare for their next vacation - of course, their next vacation in France. Or is it nicer somewhere else? It is typically French to hate any kind of work. With this mentality, France has become the fifth economic power in the world.
Camembert, baguette and beret
Even kindergarten toddlers in France have to eat tons of baguette and camembert so that they can later become good French people. Berets are compulsory in all schools. Anyone who has finished school and doesn't like red wine loses their citizenship. If you want to become typically French, you practice early.
Paris and the Eiffel Tower on a keychain
The Eiffel Tower is typically French. In fact, he's typically Parisian. But: Paris = France - province. Or: France = Paris + province. And who cares about the province? Therefore, all French praise and praise the Eiffel Tower. He is France's totem. Napoleon is dead, but the Eiffel Tower is standing. Every French person has a small Eiffel Tower dangling from their keys. And that's just as well.
Language, pride and national awareness
Typically French is a very 'relaxed' relationship to one's own nation for the Germans. This is because Vercingetorix beat Caesar terribly at the time. Also Napoleon and Charles de Gaulle. If you need more reasons to believe in your own greatness, you will never understand France. That is why only members of a 'petite nation' learn foreign languages. The French expect you to speak French.
Love letters to the nuclear energy supplier
Every weekend the Frenchman sits down at his desk and writes a love letter to his atomic energy supplier in which he honors and praises them and asks them to build new nuclear power plants on the German-French border. Atomic energy is typically French. Incidentally, it is also the desire to annoy Germans. The French prefer to annoy the English. If he could do what he wanted, every Frenchman would have his own nuclear power plant in the front yard.
Scents and colors of Provence
The scents and colors of Provence are typically French. They waft through all of France and even cover the atomic reactors in sheer loveliness. Ah, lavender! German tourists can still smell it in northern France.
Red wine and rosé - Ça ne se discute pas!
The best wines in the world are typically French: Bordeaux red wines, rosé from Provence et ainsi de suite. I'm not arguing here either. Point.
Cars and their bumpers
It is also typically French that the French auto industry does not have quite the reputation in the world that French wines enjoy. Renault, Peugeot, Citroen vs. Mercedes, BMW, VW: well ... Because this fact makes the French aggressive, they use the horn and bumper quite freely on the road. German is: constant corrections in the parking space, French: boom!
C'est the revolution!
Revolution is typically French. Wives are already revolutionizing early in the morning in France. The children do not recognize any authority and strike at the slightest cause. When the French farmers are dissatisfied with the weather, they block the highways with their tractors. Annoying bosses are unceremoniously fired by the employees - sometimes in the truest sense of the word. The most dangerous job in France is: President. Nobody wants to do the job. That's why François Hollande has it now. Every Frenchman keeps a guillotine in the storeroom - in case a king or mother-in-law might rise over him again.
Horse meat and nouvelle cuisine
Because the eternal revolution goes through the stomach, France has the best food in the world. Did you know that the “French gastronomic meal” is on the Unesco World Heritage List? Now you know! The French eat: snails, frogs legs, horse meat ... Well, the Germans eat horse meat too, but unconsciously. The nouvelle cuisine is also typically French. It would taste excellent if there was something. But the ingenious essence of nouvelle cuisine is not to sell anything very expensive. The overweight Germans don't understand that.
Savoir-vivre and antidepressants
In general: Savoir-vivre is typically French. French people enjoy life every second. That is why there are so many alcoholics in France, and doctors competitively prescribe antidepressants. But the French tourism industry knows how to market the country, and that's how you live like God in France.
The little café on the corner
After all, an infrastructure that consists almost 100 percent of small cafes on the street corner is typically French. There the sun always glitters through the plane trees. And if you are a man, there are only young, beautiful French women sitting at the next tables, who all want to flirt with you while they drink café au lait. But if you are a woman, Brad Pitt bends down as a waiter to you personally and asks you in a French accent what he could do for you. C'est la vie!
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