Which topic is important in 10

10 questions about development and psychology

How important are siblings? What can i do if a Child often beats or freak out? Experts answer these and other questions in our dossier on the subject Development & Psychology

Editor: Claudia Landolt
Image: Kirsten Lewis

How important are siblings?

A child doesn't need siblings to thrive. Of course, having a brother or sister has advantages - but also disadvantages. An only child is quite simply a variant and not a reason for parents to have a guilty conscience. This feeling of guilt is more likely to be fed by the wishful thinking or the image that parents paint of a family. It's safe to forget.

Have only children neither more advantages nor more disadvantages as siblings. Much more important for a child than a sibling is that it grows up in an environment in which it can thrive.

Jürg Frick, sibling researcher, psychologist FSP, author, lecturer and consultant at the University of Education in Zurich

What can I do if a child hits a lot or freaks out?

Children learn how to deal with their feelings and how to develop an internal control body during kindergarten. What appears to parents to be defiant behavior is often due to an immaturity of the child's brain, which is simply not yet able to control some reactions.

The Impulse control develops by itself over time. However, you can support the child to develop their potential for self-control and deferment of needs. In order for children to practice their impulse control, they need adult guidance. Often they are not yet able to formulate their needs, their impressions and their feelings, so they react emotionally and physically.

Therefore it is important that Parents formulate what the child is feeling. With increasing maturity, the opportunity to put yourself in the other person's position also increases. "I don't like being hit, so my friend doesn't like being hit either." This essential insight works better than any prohibition.

Moritz Daum, developmental psychologist

How important is early intervention?

The knowledge of brain research that the human brain develops in a way that depends on its use leads many parents to the wrong conclusion that one has to train the brain like a muscle. Because they want to make their children fit for the globalized world, many parents have one dangerous virus captured: the Förderitis.

Fearing that their children could lose touch with a globalized education society, they try to support their children in every possible way: early English, children's yoga, painting courses and music lessons alternate with each other in a tight schedule. The parents overlook that social environment determines brain development much more than any training. So parents cannot be encouraged enough to take their children's play seriously.

André Zimpel, educational scientist

Should parents allow their children to slip into their parents' bed at night?

All parents understand that small children are easily distressed and stressed when they are alone on their way to sleep. And everyone knows that small children cannot actually be alone during the day either. Opinions differ when it comes to dealing with sleep. Some give in to the children's need for closeness, others oppose it and rely on more distance. Even in this country, the answer is still very often: You have to do it yourself. You have to learn to sleep - the way it is right: alone. The sleep problem seems to be a legacy from human history.

Because all living beings, whether small or large, come first when it comes to sleep Security problem: Anyone who falls into a kind of coma is defenseless and defenseless for a long time. So it's good if you put conditions on the sandman! For example, we grown-ups make sure that the front door is locked and that it doesn't blow too cold through the window. Our children ensure safety in their own way: they can then relax when you know your trusted, protective caregivers are with you.

So it's no wonder that young children get stressed when they feel alone on their way to sleep. I think it helps when we look at our own sleep; there isn't one trick, but it's always about relaxation, about that Feeling of a sleeping home - when we get there, we'll come down.

Maybe we should remember the fire we once sat by and told stories. Would we have got up and put our child to bed behind the bushes? And annoyed us which stories we are missing right now? No, the child would have fallen asleep sometime in the middle. It found its sleeping home somewhere. With this thinking, some things can be approached more relaxed today, also for ourselves.

Herbert Renz-Polster, pediatrician and bestselling author