How do you touch a girl

Finding a girlfriend: 10 tips & 5 no-gos on the way to the next relationship

You want to find a girlfriend, but you are tired of dating sites or dating apps? We'll tell you how you can go from a non-committal flirt to a relationship. If you follow our tips and no-gos, you will also be able to find a friend in everyday life.


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Find a girlfriend with these 10 tips

It's harder to make women your girlfriend when you already know them. Usually the fear of overcoming is even greater suddenly asking her out on a date. Plus, the famous friend zone could get in your way. Most singles therefore try their luck with strange women, with whom it is easier to start a flirt right from the start. In the following, we'll tell you the best places to find a girlfriend, which tips will help you make more of a flirt and which no-gos you should definitely avoid.

Overcome fear - find a girlfriend

Overcome your fear

Most men get excited when they approach a woman. Some have learned to hide it well. This is not about pretending to be, but simply developing a routine and not letting your excitement take hold of you. After all, you can be nervous without obviously showing it on the outside.

The very first step is learning to flirt. Flirting is basically the basic requirement to find a girlfriend. If you're scared of even speaking to the women and they are preventing you from maintaining a conversation, practice first. You can already do this in very ordinary everyday situations in which you arbitrarily speak to a girl. It's not about what she looks like or what you can imagine with her, but about making contact with a woman without losing your composure. Over time you will become more confident and your entire demeanor will change.

Practice creates masters

Finding a girlfriend: practice makes perfect

After you've overcome your fear of targeting women, it's time to hone your flirting skills. Even if you don't have a talent for rhetoric, you can improve your flirting behavior through practice. Here you should address women who you are really interested in. It should become clear during the conversation that you have no friendly intentions. In this way you bypass the possibility of a friend zone and know immediately whether she is also interested in you or not.

A good flirtation practice is to smile while looking into her eyes. A subtle but conscious smile shows her that you find her likeable and that she enjoys your full attention. Looking directly in the eyes shows that you are confident. If you find that she is intimidated to evade you or cannot meet your gaze, that is a good sign that you have a chance with her. Even if they have to smile over and over again when you smile, you can take that as a positive sign.

Take up situations

If you're trying to find a friend, don't approach her too brashly. Pick-up lines can be a fun conversation starter, but if she doesn't understand your humor, you could quickly lose your chance. To be on the safe side, you'd better pick up a situation to get into conversation. For example, on a train ride, ask her if you should carry her suitcase or in a store if she can help you find a nice shirt.

Body contact

If you want to find a girlfriend, you should always proceed cautiously. Everything should be done step by step. This applies both to the establishment of a conversation and to touch. If you greet her out of nowhere and suddenly grab her waist, she's guaranteed to flinch. But once you get into conversation with her and after a while you touch her arm, you have better chances.

Physical contact is important to test your limits and to convey to her that you have no friendly interest in her. If you are unsure, you can come up with an excuse to touch her. Pay close attention to the signals she gives you. If she evades, take it slower. If it continues to behave naturally, you can take the next step. Always touch her gently and not too briskly. Harmless parts of the body that are suitable for first body contact are the hands or arms. The back, hips and waist are a bit more intimate. You should absolutely avoid touching your chest or bottom. After all, you want to find a girlfriend and not a one-night stand.

The first kiss

The first kiss

If you want a relationship, don't go too fast with your first kiss. It is important to test beforehand through physical contact whether she is ready for a kiss. At the end of the first date, you can give it a try, if you have a good feeling. If she still evades, try next time. The main thing is not to push the woman or appear pushy. Otherwise she withdraws.

The first kiss between two strangers is always very special. You should make an effort while kissing to make a good impression. Start gently at first and then pay attention to her signals. Not every girl is comfortable making out with someone in public. So make sure that you kiss her in a more secluded place if possible or hold back a little in a public situation. You can find out here how to learn to kiss better.

Boost self-confidence

For women, appearance is often not that important as long as you are convinced of yourself and offer her security. This does not mean financial security, but that she believes that with you by her side, she can do anything. If you have a high level of self-esteem and can support her emotionally, your chances of keeping her are good. Self-confidence results from self-confidence and self-worth. A high level of self-confidence requires that you know a lot about yourself and that you are aware of what you can and cannot do. A high self-esteem makes you appreciate your talents and merits. We have summarized a few important points for you with which you can strengthen your self-confidence.

  • Do you feel comfortable in your body?
    If you are dissatisfied, you find it particularly difficult to approach women. The fear of a basket increases enormously and you think to yourself: Why should a woman love you if you cannot even love yourself? Change that and work on your body: exercise or eat a healthy diet.
  • Are you satisfied with your life
    Frustration from the job or other disruptive factors in your life also affect your charisma. A positive mindset and charisma are important for how the woman perceives you. After all, everyone would like to have a partner who is happy and satisfied and exudes a zest for life.
  • What do joy and family like about you?
    People with low self-esteem tend not to appreciate not only their bodies, but also their character. A good self-esteem exercise is asking friends and family what they actually like or love about you. The best thing to do is to let them write everything down so that you can read over and over again in weak moments what you should appreciate about yourself.

build up trust

You don't have a lot of trust in the affair, but you do in your partner. Finding a girlfriend is nothing more than making an acquaintance in a relationship. However, this assumes that the woman trusts you. You can find out how you can build trust here. We have already summarized some important points for you in advance:

  • Give a leap of faith.
    If the woman doesn't want to tell you everything about herself at the beginning, you should accept that and not immediately assume that she has something to hide. Tolerate a little skepticism if you don't know each other very well and give her a leap of faith by telling a lot about yourself. If she knows a lot about you, she'll tell you a lot about herself at some point.
  • Be authentic.
    If you are self-deprecating and honest, it comes across as authentic and trustworthy. Trust and sympathy are directly related to each other. If she believes you are who you are, you have a good chance of a relationship.
  • Don't be prejudiced.
    If you rate a woman in advance by how she looks, sooner or later that will come to the fore in the conversation. Either you do not trust her to do certain things or associate her with clich├ęd properties and can thus quickly step into the faux pas. Only when you get to know each other and through various topics of conversation will you find out how she relates to life. So be open and interested from the start.

Find places to girlfriend

Places to find girlfriends: Much more than just bars and clubs

In theory, you can find a girlfriend anywhere. The classics are clubs and bars. But if you are not one of the typical party goers, there are enough alternatives in everyday life. Flirting situations in clubs and bars can also be initiated in very ordinary places. This includes, for example, waiting on the platform with many other people, traveling by train together, going to the bakery or supermarket in the morning. But you can also make great friends in the gym, in the electronics store, at the bus stop, in the park or at the university.

No matter where you go in your everyday life, you will surely meet women on a regular basis, some of whom you like. Just talk to her and see what happens. We have collected a few examples for you of how you can open a conversation. You can tell from her first reaction whether she is averse or whether it is worth continuing to talk to her.

  • In the train: Can i help you with your suitcase / Is this seat free?
  • In the park: How cute is that your dog?
  • In the electronics market: Hey can i help you somehow? I don't work here, but I thought I'd ask.
  • At the bakery: (before she has ordered and you are asked what you want) I'll take what she takes.
  • In the supermarket: Hello, can you tell me where to find the oatmeal?

Pay attention to their needs

Prove the woman that you are a suitable friend by listening to her needs. Be attentive and show her that you mean something, even if you haven't known each other that long. This way she develops trust faster and feels safe with you. Do you see that she's freezing? Offer her your jacket. Have you been on the road for a while? Ask her if she would like something to eat or drink. Did she mention in passing that she wanted to be an astronaut as a child? Take her to a planetarium. Does she have a dog? Suggest that you take him for a walk so you can get to know him. Does she seem insecure to you? Compliment her.

Treat those around you well

When women are looking for a relationship, there are always - even if subconsciously - certain questions about the future that the man has to meet. For example, she will surely ask herself at some point whether you would be a good father or how you would get on with her mother. If you talk badly about people around you, blaspheme friends or your parents, or react unkindly when they call you, it could reduce your chances of becoming a potential new friend. Most women value family and social skills. Show yourself that you have emotional intelligence and get on well with others.

Don't find a girlfriend with these 5 no-gos

There are several reasons why a relationship doesn't come from a date or an acquaintance. There may be a point here or there that you weren't sure about the implications. Make sure that you are not making any classic mistakes and avoid these no-gos.

Don't pretend

Many men pretend to be a woman for fear of being beaten. You really want it to work out with her and try to show yourself at your best. Unfortunately, it goes wrong more often than well. As a rule, there are two options: In the first, the woman immediately notices that something is wrong. Her alarm bells are ringing and she doesn't want to see you again because she just doesn't feel good about it.

In the second situation, you somehow manage to sell yourself really well and convince her to go out with you. But over time it becomes problematic to maintain this facade. If at some point you can no longer hide the real you, she will be angry that you have pretended to be or she will always be disappointed because she is in love with a certain image of you and not with the person you really are. This scam might work if you're looking for a one night stand, but not if you really want to find a girlfriend.

Leave your cell phone in your pocket

If you want to find a girlfriend, you should definitely always give her your full attention. That means: leave your cell phone in your pocket when you go on dates. If you keep checking your watch or checking for the news, it could get the impression that you have someone else on your mind or that you still have appointments. She won't put any hopes in you and there may not be a next date.

No personal hygiene, no girlfriend

An unkempt appearance is a common exclusion criterion. So if you're going on a date and want to convince the girl of you, be sure to take a shower beforehand, use deodorant and perfume. But don't overdo it. A mixture of your own body odor and perfume is best for women. If you let yourself go, it could create the impression that the woman is not worth dressing up for her or that you are simply unsanitary.

Don't put pressure on them

Don't put pressure on them

If you want to get together with a woman, you need patience. If you're too hasty and pressurize her, she can pull back. It is different for everyone how quickly they trust and get involved in a relationship. Some women may have had bad experiences in their previous relationships and therefore developed a certain fear of attachment. So show sensitivity and allow yourself to be met by their needs. Do not kiss her until you are sure that she agrees and do not confess your love to her until you are sure that she has feelings for you too.

No ownership claims

In the getting-to-know-you phase in particular, it is important not to claim ownership yet. Jealousy and envy are poison for any relationship and especially at the beginning they can ruin a lot. If you have not yet defined your status and are still in the dating phase, you should avoid any thoughts of jealousy. If you are already reacting sensitively because the waiter is talking to her nicely or because she is texting a buddy, she will quickly worry about how this will go on in the future when you are really together. When the time comes, you can still clarify what is okay with you in a relationship and what is not. Your jealousy will also likely go away once you trust it completely. You can find out how to deal with jealousy and envy here.

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